Sunday, June 24, 2007

Family, legal and binding

Originally posted August 9, 2006

Family, legal and binding
Current mood: happy
Category: Life

Yesterday was a terrific day in the Barr household!! Let me share. (I have to start with some history)

Daniel and I met and fell in love in July of 2000. Rebecca was 3 at that time. I had been separated from her biological father for a year and was processing the divorce. Daniel and I married in March, 2001. So were right at about 5-1/2 years married. Any way, About 6 months ago, he and I were outside on the back porch, having a conversation when he told me that he wanted to adopt Rebecca. It came out of the blue, I had no idea that he felt that strongly, but he was very clear, and said that hed said what he wanted to say and wouldnt bring it up again. Well, I thought long and hard, because I was kind of against it at first. I wasnt trying to be selfish; I just worried that if Daniel and I end up not making it the distance, it would be harder for her to take. As I took my time deciding, I watched them interact. I know that Daniel is 50 times the father to Rebecca than her bio-father ever was. I know that Rebecca loves Daniel as her father, and it seemed unfair that she was unable to carry his last name, as I do. I would never have suggested or pushed this on Daniel, or anyone, for that matter, because to me, my children are MY responsibility. So I had to struggle with my own understanding of parenting, and sharing. I finally got there. With some loving advice from people I respect, I worked it out in my own mind, and gave Rebecca the father she loves, and gave Daniel the daughter he adores. The judge approved the termination of bio-fathers parental rights and the adoption yesterday 8/8/06. Daniel said it was one of the best things ever to have happened to him. I hope he still thinks so when she becomes a teen-ager. LOL.

Special thanks to my Employer, Attorney Doug Omer, for helping me out at cost, because it would have been impossible otherwise.

Also thanks to my sister, who came along and snapped a few pictures.


Leah said...

Oh, that is WONDERFUL!!! Dean, too, is more dad to Angela than her bio dad has ever been. He knows her far better than her bio dad does. He is her dad. Her bio dad, on the other hand, will never give up his parental rights. I would still let him see her, because she does love her dad and I would never keep her from him, but other than paying sporadic child support he doesn't do much for her. Takes her once a month but it always seems to be an inconvenience for him. I'm glad that it's a permanent thing for your family. I bet it makes Becca feel more secure. How did she feel about changing her last name?

Kathy said...

She HATED her last name (zuniga) and LOVES her new last name (barr) goes so much better with Becca.